After the promises made
And the friendship claimed
After the assurances rendered
And the affection feigned
Apology, you declare

A day as this was never to come
The monsters were far
The monsters were few
Not to be met again

Had I not set the boundaries wide
And the walls strong?
Battles as these were never to be fought
Not again

Your relentless pursuit
Did I get it wrong?

Protect, my heart had cried in fear
Pretend I did, never to care
A friend someday, proclaimed you
Fight I did, my guilt that rose,
for defense was my only goal
The fight didn’t last,
And the walls all broke
A friend maybe, accept I did

Protect yourself,
my soul stirred again
Ignore I did,
its painful plea

And then came the days
When hate creeped in
Spiteful words were all that stayed
Playful pranks had long gone by
The ghosts of the past had now come to play

When history repeats
The memories flood
With empty words
And bitter lies
The pain and its depth
I wish I could bear

On days like these,
when answers evade,
I ask myself,
was it me?

Ask if I may,
What worth does it hold
This apology rendered
After all that has passed

On nights like these,
when the ghosts come haunt
I ask myself,
have the lessons been learnt?

Among answers none,
I create a space
Never to let another in
Never to let another in